A letter to my pre-teen daughter

August 25, 2015

Tuesday

Bangalore, India

To our dearest Nene Srish,

You are eleven years old now and will be twelve next month. One more year, and you will be in your early teens - an exciting and challenging time for most people.

I think it's time, once again, to write you another letter. Yet another one that you may find too long to read, but I hope that someday, one day, you can go back to them and find them useful as you face our evolving world. 

To begin with, allow me to say, that your kindness and compassion to others, continue to amaze me. It's all what we really wanted to work so hard on, your daddy and I - which is  to raise a child who will change the world with her heart, one meeting after another. But we didn't have to do anything much, from the day you opened your eyes, hours after your birth, that first smile, already spelt - Love.

Day after day, you make us proud. We see you reach out, comfort, understand - and more often than needed, you hold yourself tight in challenging times, stretch yourself and have always chosen to understand others. We are no match to your inner beauty, your father and I. Well, that too, the outer one! (smiles)

But love has its price. Others prey on it, while others are intimidated by it. Others may challenge it. 

Today, we spoke about this powerful opportunity to clarify our dynamic understanding of ourselves, and the values we hold dear when others wish to shake our knowing of what is truly important in life.

You are deeply loved. And every cell in your being is lovable. Soon you will find out, as you keep on searching, the truth in this matter. There is really no them and us, at the end of the day. It may be too much to ask for, though you always found this easier than I do - to treat everyone with compassion, including ourselves. We become indestructible, when we are clear that we must be part of the people and the things we love, care of, protect and cherish.

Stay compassionate to others, but as Gandhi said: "Never allow anybody to walk on your head with their dirty feet."

As your mother, I feel the deep need to protect you from all the possible harsh conditions of life; but I haven't really gotten around to do that. Not only because, realistically, I cannot, but because there is a part of me that understands that, giving you the tools to survive  and thrive with grace in life, is way more powerful than standing in the way of your growth and self-discovery.

Your father and I, including your grandparents, always try our best to teach you everything we know, and how we can leave you to know on your own; but you will find out in the end, that you will have your own knowing and understanding, as you will experience life differently from us. 

We raised you to be a global citizen and to understand that each one is unique whatever their colour or physical and mental conditions are. And that locked and expressed in each one - is the varied manifestation of the Divine. We only need to be still, look closely, and see. You learned all these, to our delight, way early in life. We watched you carefully, and we, were often shaking our heads in pride of your maturity.

You've understood that material things can help us enjoy life, but are not our sources of joy. You've understood, that people in pain tend to hurt others. Continue to embrace all of life, yet rise above other people's drama, brought about by their experiences and choices in life - shall they rub it against you. 

Swirl gracefully around the rocky edges of others. Respond with courage without harming another. Get out of people's way in a way that their own actions will teach them their own lessons. 

Simply, avoid energies that zap you, bring you down and those that do not lift you up nor inspire you.

Never underestimate the power of your company or your environment. Choose the people you allow into your life, wisely, taking in consideration your own well-being.  Seek out people who can inspire you and who will respond to your inspiring presence, leave those who are not. It's called respecting people's space and choices in life.

Let your heart be your guide, but protect it from the wolves of fear.

We love you beyond measure.

Mama

Links to your previous letters

http://matajitvsharma.blogspot.in/2013/08/botswana-southern-africa-april-18-2012_4797.html

http://matajitvsharma.blogspot.in/2009/05/letters-1-love-in-action.html

http://matajitvsharma.blogspot.in/2009/05/letters-2.html

http://matajitvsharma.blogspot.in/2009/05/keeping-my-promise-to-myself-part-1.html